My Friend

Practically Speaking
By C. Wayne Childers

My Friend

A young girl "de-petals" a flower one at a time. "He loves me." "He loves me not." This cadence is repeated until the "petal-less" stem is naked. She is relieved that the chant ended with "He loves me." That is good to know.

George Strait sang the song about a boy who passed a note to a girl he admired. She was given the option of checking "yes" or "no" to the question of "Do you love me? Do you want to be my friend?" The song also had a happy ending. She checked "yes." That is good to know.

I hate to pop your bubble but did you know that some people are not going to love you and are not going to be your friend? That is right. The petal reveals, "he loves me not" and the box is checked with a big fat "NO."

It happened to Jesus, the babe of Christmas. Many did not love him and many refused to be his friend, even those who claimed to be his friend. Jesus responded by working around them to complete His purpose. He tolerated some and challenged the most religious. He did what His father said, he conducted His "Father's business." At the same time He trained eleven and focused on the three and then the one, Peter. His focus was not a human report card but the Divine "Yes." God was pleased and that was all that mattered.

The truth is that Jesus has made His decision. "He loves me." He checked "YES." He wants to be my friend. That is also true for you.

I like the song by that name; "What a friend we have in Jesus." The last section of that song says: "Do thy friends despise, forsake you? ... In his arms He'll take and shield you ... You will find a solace there." I know that solace today.

So that is what friends do. They shield you in their arms. They provide solace. Friends are few but cherished but none of them are like Jesus. He's that one closer than a brother. You are not heavy to him. What a friend!

Practically Speaking

By C. Wayne Childers

No Comparison

My daughter posted a quote by CS Lewis that resonated with me today. It is, 

"Comparison is the thief of joy." This statement is especially true at Christmas time. So many parents stress out over wanting to please their children so much that they go overboard in trying to get them what "everybody else" has. The standard of "everyone else" is never attained in this lifetime. Wants and needs have to be measured against values. "What do I want my children to value?" should be the question.

I discovered that there is a popular doll that "every" little girl "wants" but it is quite expensive. Some can get the doll with no stretch, but I understand that it is just an 18" doll. The clothes made for it will fit any 18" doll, even one bought for $2 at a thrift store. What should a parent do if they cannot afford the doll? Don't buy it and don't feel guilty. Be creative. Give yourself. Give values. Teach financial responsibility. Listen to a different drummer. No one is superior just because they can purchase a certain doll. Teach that to your children. No one is inferior if they can't.

There is a principle in scripture that helps me. We are reminded that comparisons of this nature "miss the point." 

"We’re not, understand, putting ourselves in a league with those who boast that they’re our superiors. We wouldn’t dare do that. ( somewhat tongue in cheek) But in all this comparing and grading and competing, they quite miss the point." (2 Corinthians 10:12 MSG)

Comparison is a thief. It will steal your joy. You are you. You are the you that God created. You are where you are. In most situations, that will not change. Contentment is the opposite of comparison. It does not mean that you never seek to do better. It does not mean you set aside all ambition. It does mean that you learn when enough is enough.

Paul nailed it again,

"... for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, weather it is ... with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:11-13 NLT)

If you give from these values there is no comparison. There is no guilt. You can welcome joy again to your Christmas celebration.

Sent from my iPad

Sad For Holidays

Practically Speaking
By C. Wayne Childers

Sad For Holidays

It seems strange that "the most wonderful time of the year" can be the most sorrowful time to many. Sadness is as common as gladness. For every jolly ole Saint Nick, there are those who would just as soon trade the holiday for a root canal. They would rather hurt than cry on the inside.

What can help? I know "suck it up" so many more people in the world have so much more to cry about. Well that is one method. Like my parents used to say, " if you don't quit crying I'll give you something to cry about." Now that really helps.

Well the cure for sadness is not just the act of man. It is not trying to think differently. It is not something most of us can do by getting busy or being distracted through entertainment, pleasure or chemical sedation both legal and illegal. The cure for sadness is the same cure as for lostness (a common term used by believers in Jesus for those who have yet to believe in Jesus). The cure is from above us and beyond. The cure is spiritual not material. It is facilitated with a simple conversation with God.

I ask you, "have you asked God to heal your sadness?" He has given you tear ducts to express it and that helps. But have you asked Him for help? Have you asked Him for salvation? Deliverance? Healing? Try it this season. Just ask Him? Talk to the silence about how you feel.

The good book expressed one persons discovery. "You have changed my sadness into joyful dance. You have taken away my sorrow and surrounded me with joy." Psalm 30:11

So sad is normal and has a healing process. However, after time, sad can be bad. At that point our sadness is only healed by help beyond ourselves and helping professionals. We need an intervention. A divine intervention.

Jesus is Emmanuel or "God with us." Joy to the world The Lord is come!


Sent from my iPad

Teaching Church History

Well I found out yesterday that I am teaching Church History in the MTI program for Capitol Baptist Association and Oklahoma Baptist University. However, it is about the students. But, church history? Man I will have to study....what an assignment.

Floyd McKee is in trouble for taking that Old Testament class. I had already taught that and it would have been easier....now I am going to have to work. Thanks Floyd.

Going to need Robert Bakers book, the new one. Does anyone have it?

It will be a nice journey down memory lane with some really motivated OBU students. God bring them on and teach me more. Help me to be able to use it at Minco as well.

My Grandson Is One

Big Wrig is one year old and this is him in a hub. Yes he is the center of our world right now and we are eating it up. I am not sure about the orange color in the background but he looks good. Wouldn't you agree?

I prayed for him today. I asked God to help him to be an influence for the Kingdom. I asked God to lead him to take risks in life. I asked God to make him bold but loving, relational but relevant, happy but realistic. I want him to be himself and to be the best self God can make him to be.

I wish I could spare him some of the pitfalls of my life. I know he will have to deal with his own. Mine have helped me be more the man and his will as well.

He has great parents and a great sister. He is going to receive into his life others who will guide him God's way and others who will tempt him to take the cheap, easy way. Don't go that way Wrigley.

If he plows, that is great. As long as after every row he realizes that God is the provider of all things. If he golfs, that is great. As long as after ever 18 he realizes that God is more interested in the Kingdom than the links. If he sings, that is great. As long as he realizes that when the music is over it is God that created the song. He is the greatest.

Give me the ability to guide him as his granddad or paw paw.

He is one and number ONE in my book today.

Laptop Not Included

It was an ad in the newspaper for one of the big box stores. It was a laptop cover and was on sale for $5. Then you knew you were in Oklahoma when the ad was qualified with the statement "Laptop Not Included." Duh!

Now that would be a deal for $5 to get a laptop included with a cover. We are all looking for something for nothing. That is the premise of gambling (gaming) addictions. I can take $5 and make it worth $2,000. Even if that happens, what do we do next?

A person's life is worth something only when he discovers the principle of loss and gain. We can gain everything and lose the most important thing; i.e. our eternal soul. We can gain the world and lose heaven. That is not a good trade.

Therefore, today take a step closer to discovering the one who can save your soul. Everything else is just a cheap cover.

Judging People

I am learning about judging people today. It is not helpful. It hurts especially if I question their motives. Of all people I learned something from Joe Biden our vice president when he was interviewed on the Tonight Show last night. He said it has always been his practice to never judge people's motives because we cannot read their minds. He said one can judge their judgement in decisions but never their motives. What good advice.

Today I choose to think the best of people. I am going to disagree with their decisions sometime but never their motives.

Everyone is doing the best they can to get what they want. My job is to help them get there or to change their quality world so that getting there is possible.

Bah Humbug

We do not have a tree up, or lights or anything this year. It is not because we have nothing to celebrate. We have parties at church, at the firefighters group, at work and at my brothers house. Our church is beautiful...

We are just going to be in Plano Texas for Christmas. I like that. Saw some bird seed on sale and plan to get it for my Mother in Law who feeds the birds in her back yard. It is fun watching them. I love it. I think of my Father in Law when I see the squrels heat the feed. He tried to shoot them with a bb gun. Ha.

Life is good. Life is changing. I am older, a bit lazier, unmovable on some things and confused at what I see around me. People are desperate. People are sad. People are unrealistic.

So, Christmas is going to be a surprise this year. I like that.

Before John's Garage

This is a picture of my dad when he worked at Oklahoma Transportation Company in Oklahoma City. As you look at the picture he is the first man on the second row from right to left. His partner at John's Garage is on the first row third man from right to left.

Soon after this picture was taken my dad suffered from pneumonia and was hospitalized. He almost died in a Tulsa hospital. John opened a garage on his own and asked our dad to join him after dad got out of the hospital. He could not work much but John provided a way until he got up on his feet.

People helping people is a good thing. It is interesting that both of these men have sons who are in ministry today.

I celebrate common people today. Those who help. Those who get involved. Those who do.

Eureka Springs Arkansas

I get to go for doughnuts tomorrow with my son-in-law and granddaughter. Then we all go together to Eureka Springs. That is where Laurie and I spent our honeymoon. We stayed in the Crescent Hotel. See picture to left.

It will be a great day.

I don't want it to end but I am also looking forward to Sunday. I have a great sermon I received from God and Albert McClellan (a great friend of Dr. Sam Scantland). It is an old book but the truths about faith are remarkable. I am learning from it. It is called Creative Expectancy he was a very insightful man and speaks my language. He is on my wave link. 

I also look forward to meeting with two couples for marriage counseling, having Ken Shiplet speak on dealing with conflict and on going to the State Bible Conference on Monday. I am so blessed beyond my expectations.

I am seeing God do some miraculous things. The market has come back in a gangbuster way for my portfolio. I took some risks and it was worth it. God was guiding all the way. He did it and my job now is to get the thing in a place where I don't have to mess with it or be preoccupied with it. God help me to get to that place soon.  I am seeing some church conflict and know it is in the center of God's will. Some may not understand but God is in charge. He is leading me to deal with something that has been around a long time.

I am dealing with decisions and seeking to enter the rest talked about in Hebrews. I have struggled with a health issue but God even used that. My face is no longer crooked. However, I still feel some paralysis. A reminder of my temporary nature. I am not build to stay here forever. 

My granddaughter drew a fish on my hand with a pen, asked me to read a book to her, charmed me in dozens of ways and made me proud that I have grown older. 

Tomorrow will be good. I will take what comes my way. I will be content. I will seek to be a peacemaker. I will seek to touch others. I am His and He is mine. I am full. 

Bad Decisions

I am in the process of making some bad decisions. Well, I would like to think I am just the victim of circumstance and that I am justified in my bad decisions. But here they are. I have decided to quit working out at least the last two weeks. I have also decided to quit my diet at least the last two weeks. I have also decided to depress more at least the last two weeks. It is interesting that I can always come up with excusses to get off track. Here I am so what do I do?

One...I start walking again tomorrow here in Arkansas. Two....I start my better selection and quantities of food today. Three....I talk about what issues I am facing now. I want to do that in this blog.

I am still trying to be the financial super star for my entire family and church family. I am trying to be the source for everyone from my grandchildren to my churches bus fund to my brothers retirement. Why am I doing that? For some reason I have this messiah complex. God help me to know what to do today. I feel I have to make up the losses and some people are patient and others are not. God I need wisdom. I am lost.

I am still trying to be all things to all people and to try to help everyone. God help me to know what to do today for ministries sake.

The best decision I made today is to write in this blog. I am motivated more now.

Sometimes I feel neglected. Help me to deal with my own neglect by being a servant to those I seek support from.

God bail me out again. Help me to know my territory and your territory. Help me to live in my territory and no where else.

Goals For The New Week

This summer I went to Six Flags with our students. One of my men suggested I ride with him on one of the more aggressive personal torture chambers that spin, twist and go upside down called a "ride." I did it. All I can say is that when I touched the ground the first words out of my mouth were "I'm glad that is over."

Today I am glad that Sunday is over. It was quite a ride for me emotionally. Marriage counseling, preaching without Laurie present (she was on call and had to go to work), an intervention with a family in the community, two emotion filled meetings (at least for me they were) that I made it through without a major blow up* (my goal) and finally home to bed and the continuing episode of the Unit.

I am going to a peer learning community monthly meeting today. I am currently reading the assignment and answering the thought questions. I want to get back to a more consistent work out. Last week only two days. The week before only two days in five. I want to get back to at least three days. Today is the key.

However, I want to rethink Sunday. There were some things that happened that were encouraging. One, a couple, young couple, came in just before the evening meeting and she had made Laurie and I a care package. It was a basket with a candle, book, fuzzy bear and a card of appreciation. A gift first to come from this couple. It was a surprise. I did not know I meant so much to them. Also, I received a call from a former Heroin addict that our church "helped." We had some hard words at one time. I thought I alienated her. She used us at one time and I was gullible. She was saying thank you and telling me she was moving to Montana to be with her daughter and grandchildren. I will call her today that I am in a better frame of mind. I also think I helped to save some students from a potentially devastating if not life threatening situation. It created suffering for me, (I am hated) but hopefully help for them. We will see.

I received affirmation at the dreaded meetings from a person whose opinion is my litmus test for my current ministry. Someone with my backside. I also see God working through a process with His facilities at the church. Perhaps "Upwards Basketball." Yea. The jury is out.

This week I plan to do some sermon planning on Tuesday (I am not preaching this week). I finished Acts on Sunday evening and will decide what to do next. I also plan to get the printed material information to Chuck for the outreach in March. That will take some time. I will also work on follow-up on the scheduled appearances at the schools and neighborhoods. I am seeking about two men to represent our church at a meeting on Thursday. I am also wanting to visit some of our neglected nursing home people. In addition to that I would like to enlist at least 20 people to make 10 calls each to invite people to the revival with George Brock on Sunday.

Personally I want to do Andrew's taxes and start on mine. Get information for Jack on his taxes, a painful experience because of the down turn in the market. I have to once again suffer the losses for the year. I will take off on Wednesday with Laurie. She is going to Texas for a shower for our daughter on Sunday. I can't go. I want to read Romans, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy. I would also like to play golf on one day.

This entire hodgepodge has helped me to think about the week. I am content.



* I had to get up a few times and get more water or go to the bathroom to force my mind to go other places.

Sleep Is Overrated

I am not sleeping like a baby tonight. As a matter of fact it is 3:32 a.m. and I am stressing over the events of this day. I dread being back at my ministry setting because I am hurt and disappointed in myself and in the leadership of my church. We have allowed the enemy to get us sidetracked, distracted and off task.

The thing that hurts me the most about it is that the innocent, lost and needy suffer even more when the soldiers of the cross focus on trivia, self interests, isolationism and protectionism.

The message God gave me this week is right, good and on the right subject of making the right decisions in life. There are at least four people in line for baptism and I hope at least two of them will be baptized in this morning's service. That is the purpose of our existence. I will get to encounter the main stream people who are really the reason I am there. They are the misfits, hurt, hang-up driven and habit bound people who just need a word from God and an encouragement from His minister. They will get that from Him and from me. I refuse to get distracted on that front.

Then there are the other things. I am not sure what to do about that. I am in a quandry and need help. I feel all alone. I feel on a limb. I feel rejected. I feel punished. I feel beat down. When I write this I plan to read through Psalms for some insight. Perhaps these are feelings of my own making and they will pass with time. Perhaps these are feelings of God's Spirit telling me something I don't want to hear. Perhaps these are feelings of powerful motivation that will drive me deeper into my relationship with the Father.

On television above my desk is a worship video reflecting the psalms with a flowing stream in the background. What will it say next to me? I want to hear. Is there something for me? There is now snow and a path in the forest. Classical christian music is playing. It is piano music. I can just see Laurie's dad playing the piano, or Laurie or Andrew. It is beautiful. God is speaking to me.

"This is the gift of God. He will not swell unduly on the days of his life, because God keeps him busy with the joy of his heart." Ecclesiastes 5 Text on the screen.

Interesting. No need to "swell unduly on the days of my life" so I need to keep busy with the joy of my heart. That is good to know today. The joy of my heart is sharing Jesus, speaking His word, meeting new people, loving my family, building leaders, encouraging others. That is what I will do.

I still want to be just the chaplain of 29th street. God help me to visit my flock. God help open new doors for my personal ministry. I can't wait to make that first visit this week. God open my mind and heart to the opportunities You will give to me. Thank you for the joy that the thought of this brings.

Now I feel peace and am sleepy again. God magnify my rest so I will be ready later today for what you have for me. I know it will be good.

Revive us again. That is the song now. That is my prayer. Revive me again. Thanks for doing that. Thanks for the group singing. Thanks for the music video at 4:03. What an encouragement.

Now I will sleep. Thanks.

Making Ham Out of Hog

I was in Southwestern Oklahoma this past week and saw something I have only heard people talk about. I saw a wild hog. Yes, and it was in the daylight. It was big. It had tusks. It seemed mean. It was easing through a cotton field.

It looked like the hog of the prarie. It was alone and I felt sorry for it for a while. A hog all alone on the prarie. Perhaps it deserved to be alone. Perhaps it was just being a hog. It had a face only a mother could love and perhaps that is why it is alone. However, I have never seen a pretty pig even the domesticated kind. I know because my daughter and I used to raise them for FFA in Davis and Tuttle, Oklahoma.

Ranchers here hate these guys because they will kill small calves. They also root up good crops and destroy a good lawn. To them the only good wild hog is a dead one.

On this valentines day, I am glad not to be alone although at times I act like a hog. I am selfish most of the time and think I can do things by myself that should take help from others. I am a consumer. I am a scavenger. I am a nusance. I am a loner.

My counterpart has been my perfect mate. She is happy, optimistic, realistic, scientific and most of the time patient with the likes of me. She is not materialistic. She is a great mother. She is a great role model. She is my partner. She is my counselor. She is my best friend. I would never think of doing anything that would disappoint her. She is part of the reason I live. She helps me make it through the tough days and is the one I look forward to seeing every day. When I get depressed I want to be with her. When I choose to depress with no where else to go I just go to the hospital with a book and know she is near.

I trust her prayer life and know that much that has happened in ministry and through our children is because of her prayers. She never gets depressed or at least I never know it. She does not hold grudges. She has a forgetter that works very well. She is also a ham at times. And that is different than a hog.

I am just glad she likes a hog like me. She must be a little blind as well. She can make a ham out of a hog.

She is the one in red.

Moses And Me

I have been teaching from Exodus at SLBC and at a church all week in Southwest Oklahoma. It has been a rich experience for me. I got to spend time with two of my favorite people Richard and Shelly Manning and to meet some of the finest people in the world at Corinth Baptist Church. I am mentally and physically tired but resting today. I will be ready tomorrow.

Tomorrow I will preach twice, meet with Deacons and budget and finance team (the most important meetings of my ministry here) and I will counsel with a couple having marriage difficulties at 2:00. I will also finish readings for a Monday meeting (perhaps I can do that and walk at the Y at the same time). Monday, I will know more about what God's direction might be in 2010. I think it will be a confirmation of SLBC. Also, Monday I am able to meet with my pastoral learning community and bounce some things off of these ministry collegues. This is a time of renewal and transitions.

Moses and I are very similar. I have learned from Moses that confrontation and anger are counterproductive no matter how justified in your mind. I have also learned from him that when you lead that you will create conflict, discomfort, reactions and disillusionment. However, you will create progress, direction and constructive change. Change agents are always unpopular. Moses was charged with getting Egypt out of the people. They rebelled. I would rebell also. That is to be expected. God delivered them from Egypt but Moses was responsible for performing an "Egyptectomy" on these sojourners. God gave him some laws, covenant applications and a tabernacle to die for.

I have also learned from Moses that the best route is not always the easiest. God led the people the long route not the short cut. They had to face the river, the growling stomach, the dry throat, the sour water and the desperation of survival. They had to face the loss of a leader possibility when Moses was on the mountain. Moses was dissappointed. The people became fickle. Moses was both strong and weak. He saw God face to face but blew up at the people's rebellion. He was human and had a taste of the divine that no man to this point had experienced outside of Adam and Eve.

Moses made a decision in Egypt that lasted his entire life. He decided to refuse to be called the Pharoah's heir. He choose the underdogs. He choose to be himself. He choose his roots. He did the unconventional, the unfamiliar and the unusual. He chose sides with the losers, entered unfamiliar territory and challenged the establishment. He decided to be himself under God. I want to do that.

How to be myself? I must choose to side with the losers. I choose people who are sold out to Jesus who appear to be impractical, foolish and otherworldly. I want to enter the unfamiliar territory of God's will that may lead me to be more agressive, selective and intentional in ministry. It may lead me to be closer to people and less concerned about things. It may lead me to be less materialistic and more humanistic (in the proper way). I may lead me to challenge the establishment when it involves God's ways. I want to know His ways to follow Him.

I will never get there but I am closer than I was last week. Exodus has set me free. I plan to read Numbers, Leviticus and Deuteronomy to learn more. I don't think I will ever be the same.

Out Of Controll

It is a new year in the inner city church and my issues are as many as the grey hair on my head. I guess I deserve it.

A lady committed suicide Sunday, we memorialized her on Tuesday. A young man stabbed his dad and he is in the county jail waiting for my visit sometime this week. One of our young dads, with seven children, had a motorcycle accident and he is in ICU unconscious, on a thread. We have a few of our older people close to heaven and some have received news of life threatening health conditions. We just received news that we will have to cut the capacity of our cabin by 26 unless we are able to adjust some petitions.

2008 was a banner year for homegoings. We had more than 20 funerals at my last count. Some of these were pillars of the church. Needless to say we are hurting financially. Cutbacks are on the way.

On the plus side we baptized more than 50 last year and will attend a banquet to be recognized as a pacesetter in the state convention. This is primarily due to new youth leadership and two evangelistic efforts with George Brock and Kim Schmidt. We raised cash for a new bus. We contributed more than $10,000 to our legacy fund and gave over $30,000 to missions through the Cooperative Program.

I am not sure what leadership looks like on this side of the tracks. I am not even sure I am up to it today. All I know is that it is out of my control. That is probably good.

Today I realize that I am not in charge of life and death, or the economy, or people's attitudes, or the actions of others. I am only in control of myself. I have a choice today and I choose to be a person of faith. God has not resigned from His role in my life. He is at work even at this dead-end season. It is a season and He will be showing us some really special things in this time. So I do like Moses instructed the people at the Sea: I do not fear, I stand still, I watch God work, and I refuse to complain.

I have never been more out of control but in control at the same time. Thanks God for the cul de sac.

Who Are The Needy?

Three things are on my mind today that burden me.

One is a family I heard about through an e-mail. They have been kicked out of their appartment and today the dad lost his job. He just did not go to work. It is a situation I want to examine for myself but I am not sure what God wants me to do to help.

The other is a high maintenance church member who is in constant need of stroking. She is playing the no one has called me game after missing church a few times.

Finally I am concerned about Grover, the son of Ed and Luz Aungon who is in the hospital in the Philippines and in critical condition. He is very young. Has a liver disease.

What can I do?

I prayed for Grover. I visited the family and am still evaluating. I will probably call the lady on my way to a hospital visit.

That is my part. The rest is up to God and to others.

I Stole A Paper On Christmas Morning

I went to the local convenience store to get a paper but they were not open. However, the paper person had placed three stacks of new Daily Oklahoman's with their precious cargo of day after Christmas sale circulars near the door. There they were. New. Ready for sale but no one there to receive my $.50. So I took one. Yes, I stole the newspaper on the day of the birth of Jesus and I am a minister of the gospel. Now I do plan to take the money to them later in the day when they open. I stole the bad news on the day set asside to celebrate the good news.

Others tried to steal the good news soon after that time. Herod had all baby boys killed forcing Jesus' parents to take him to Egypt for a while. Then the scribes, pharasees and saducees were on a witch hunt to rid the world of such a fraud as Jesus. Finally He was nailed to a Roman cross and that was it. So, there you go. The story is over.

Not so fast. In three days he got a wake up call from God almighty and busted out of the grave and graveclothes to walk again with his disciples. He is alive. That is good news.

So I stole a paper on Christmas morning. The news was not so good but the sale circulars opened up new avenues for finding more things to buy to make my life more easy and fun. Now that is a good consumer and American thing to do.

I will get to the convenience store sometime today. Beleive me.

I'm Back

Well I guess I am getting introspective today. So I am back after several months. It is Christmas and we are having a big time with my grandaughter, son-in-law, son and daughter. My other daughter and her fiancee will be here tomorrow. I am cooking and watching videos and eating too much for a guy on a diet. I need to work out and probably will in a few minutes.

I am focused about three things today.

I am focused on my church and the tough decisions that will be made in the next few months. We are finally being confronted with the reality I knew when I first came to SLBC. We are a big ship with a limited crew and the crew is dying. My roll is to instill vision and at the same time lead the church to make the tough decisions that will involve people that we love. We have had the greatest year evangelistically yet the hardest year in breaking with the past. We are destined to have an even greater year in 2009. We are going to focus on prayer and Sunday school. I will work with staff on a prospect list, prayer focus week in January and staff prayer meetings.

Second I am also focused on my personal frame of mind and physical stamina. This is something I usuall don't address but I will. I am pleased with progress made in the last three months and I will continue. I have lost 22 lbs and have consistently ran or walked three miles a day. I am going to get the cholestoral down by February 15.

My frame of mind is another story. Christmas is a hard time for me and I have had some things happen in my extended family that have been really challenging. I am trying to not let it hinder what I do. It is hard to separate. However, I have a choice. I am not a victim.

Third, I am focused on sermon direction for January and my challenging opportunity to speak at a church on Exodus. I plan to be prayerful in the next two weeks and take a look at the scripture for what God wants to say to us in these days. It will happen.

There are some things that are out of my controll but of those things that are within my controll I plan to do three things:

1. Keep in mind that my main goal is to get closer to people not to win the argument.

2. Award myself for being successful in personal disciplines and keep my mind focused on the good things.

3. Get into the scripture and pray that the Holy Spirit will direct my thinking as I prepare. I will do this for an hour a day between now and Sunday.

So here I go. I am thinking out loud. It is fun and pregnant with great encouragement.

Dreaming

Forward thinking, strategic planning, vision making, goal setting and dreaming are all very important to church, business, family and personhood. However, most plans, dreams, visions and goals fall short of their ultimate fulfillment in life. At least that has been my experience. I had a dream of having $100,000 in endowmen in my church by the end of this year but it is only $65,000 and from only a few donors. There are approximately 12 people in the church who have taken this vision seriously enough to make consistent gifts.

I have a dream, vision, direction from God that I need to be involved in reaching spanish speaking people in our area. We attempted to start a church last year and both times we failed to get it off the ground. We have no hispanic people from our community coming here except children and youth on Wednesdays. I have challenged people to consider assisting a sister church in outreach and so far the well is empty, except for me.

I have a dream of being able myself to give back to my church more than they pay me and my vision was to do it all myself through the stock market and my "savy" investing skills. This year I have lost money and the bottom is not out of the market yet. I was going to fix it and realize my goals through buying a percentage ownership in companies or securing some debt instrument. I used some of the same techniques of the past but that wisdom did not work in these days. I am lost as to what to do.

I have a dream of guideing students to become pastors, missionaries and that SLBC can be a mission sending organization. I want students to become active in ministry while they are still students. I want student leaders. I want them to do more than just study about missions. I want them to put on a mission sweat. I want them to burn leather. I want them to engage people in christian conversations. We have none, so far.

Some of these dreams could still be fulfilled but not in my time. They may happen. They may not happen. So what do I do? I keep dreaming. I keep thinking strategically. I keep leading. I keep stretching myself and my church. I keep going. I press on.

What is my motivation for these things I ask myself. Am I trying to build a kingdom? Am I trying to gain success for personal fulfillment? Am I seeking a name for myself? Am I trying to look good in the eyes of other? I don't know. Sometimes I have to say that these may be my motivations. However, most of the time they are not. Most of the time my motivation is Kingdom. I want the Kingdom to grow, for more people to know Jesus and for people to have happy and fulfilled lives. I want to see people change. I want to do a good job. I want to fulfill my calling. That is it.

So that is the dream. It is God's dream for me. I am going to stick to it.